Busting Myths About Trans Youth: What Trans-Affirming Therapy Really Looks Like
As more parents learn about gender diversity, questions about what it means to raise or support a transgender child naturally arise. Unfortunately, misinformation and myths often cloud the conversation.
Let’s set the record straight about trans youth — and explore what trans-affirming therapy truly looks like for families seeking compassionate, evidence-based support.
Myth #1: “Kids are too young to know they’re trans.”
Fact: Many transgender people report knowing their gender identity as early as ages 3–5, the same age most cisgender children understand theirs.
According to research from the American Academy of Pediatrics, trans kids who are supported in their identity are just as mentally healthy as their cis peers (Olson et al., 2016).
In other words, knowing who you are isn’t about age — it’s about authenticity.
Myth #2: “It’s just a phase.”
Fact: Exploring identity is indeed a natural part of child development. But when a child consistently expresses a gender identity over time, it’s rarely “just a phase.”
Studies show that trans youth who are affirmed in their gender continue to identify as trans years later (Durwood et al., 2017). Affirmation doesn’t confuse kids — it supports them as they grow into who they are.
Myth #3: “Kids are being rushed into medically transitioning.”
Fact: Medical transition for minors is a careful, age-appropriate, multi-step process guided by medical and mental health professionals in partnership with families.
Transitioning involves a variety of factors, some medical, some not. Here’s what that can look like:
Social transition: The first step for many children involves non-medical changes — like using their chosen name, correct pronouns, and clothing that feels right.
Puberty blockers: For youth in early puberty, doctors may consider temporary, reversible puberty blockers to provide time for exploration and prevent distress.
Hormone therapy: Typically considered only in mid-to-late adolescence, and always following thorough psychological evaluation.
Surgical interventions: Rarely performed before 18, and usually considered only in late adolescence with extensive professional oversight (Tordoff et al., 2022).
Each step is intentional, informed, and reversible where possible — not rushed or reactionary.
Myth #4: “More kids are transitioning because it’s trendy.”
Fact: Increased visibility doesn’t mean being trans is a trend — it means more young people feel safe enough to be themselves.
Research shows that when trans youth are affirmed, they maintain stable gender identities over time (Durwood et al., 2017).
Visibility doesn’t create transgender kids — it creates space for them to thrive.
Why Trans-Affirming Therapy Matters
Trans-affirming therapy focuses on creating a safe, supportive space where trans and questioning youth can explore their gender identity without judgment.
For parents, this can mean:
Learning to use correct names and pronouns
Understanding the social and emotional aspects of gender exploration
Building resilience against stigma and bullying
Collaborating with doctors and therapists experienced in gender-affirming care
Studies have shown that affirmation saves lives. Trans youth who can use their chosen name across multiple settings experience a 73% decrease in suicidality (Russell et al., 2018).
Affirmation is life-saving care.
What Parents Can Do
If your child expresses that they may be transgender or gender diverse:
Listen with empathy. You don’t have to have all the answers — you just have to be open.
Seek out a licensed gender-affirming therapist. Look for clinicians trained in working with LGBTQ+ youth.
Connect with supportive communities. PFLAG, Gender Spectrum, and The Trevor Project offer excellent resources for families.
Keep learning. Understanding the research behind gender identity can empower you to support your child with confidence.
The Bottom Line
When we replace fear with facts, we open the door for every child to grow into their authentic self. Trans youth are not confused, pressured, or rushing — they’re simply asking to be seen and supported.
Trans-affirming therapy helps make that possible — and it gives families the tools to love, protect, and empower their children every step of the way.
Are you looking for an affirming therapist who can support you and your child through this journey? Click the button below to schedule a free 15-minute intro call today.
References
Durwood, L., Eaton, N. R., & McLaughlin, K. A. (2017). Mental health and self-worth in socially transitioned transgender youth. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 56(2), 116–123.e2.
Olson, K. R., Durwood, L., DeMeules, M., & McLaughlin, K. A. (2016). Mental health of transgender children who are supported in their identities. Pediatrics, 137(3), e20153223.
Russell, S. T., Pollitt, A. M., Li, G., & Grossman, A. H. (2018). Chosen name use is linked to reduced depressive symptoms, suicidal ideation, and suicidal behavior among transgender youth. Journal of Adolescent Health, 63(4), 503–505.
Tordoff, D. M., et al. (2022). Mental health outcomes in transgender and nonbinary youths receiving gender-affirming care. JAMA Network Open, 5(2), e220978.