What Progress Looks Like in Play Therapy
When you’re first starting the play therapy process, it might feel hard to even imagine what the end will look like, but healing and growth are possible. It’s so rewarding working with children and their families and being able to see children reach their goals and caregivers feel more confident and regulated in their responses and ability to support their child. Let’s break down the play therapy process in Synergetic Play Therapy, what progress looks like at each step, and common phrases I hear from parents when progress is happening.
1. The exploration phase.
The first phase of play therapy is known as the exploration phase, as children use play therapy sessions and the therapeutic relationship to start exploring their own feelings and challenges, and the therapist and other adults in the child’s life are gaining awareness of the root causes of feelings and behaviors. Progress in this phase looks like a ton of “aha” moments when I’m able to put the puzzle pieces together with kids and their families, and we’re creating more understanding about what’s going on. This phase is incredibly important because we can’t change what we don’t understand. This phase can look and sound like:
- A better understanding of root causes of feelings and challenges, including a better understanding of anxiety, depression, and trauma triggers
- Caregivers learn about the nervous system and their child’s brain development, and have more context for their child’s reactions
- Caregivers feel like they have a better understanding of what is causing their child’s behavior and the underlying needs that children are trying to get met
- Children are starting to increase their mind-body connection, have a better understanding of which body cues are associated with various feelings, and start to increase their feelings vocabulary and understanding of emotions
2. The choice phase.
Once we have more understanding of feelings, challenges, and what feels “stuck” for kids, we move to experiential learning and trying out new choices. Children learn best by modeling, so a lot of this phase involves the therapist modeling skills for the child (and therapists can hone in on that child’s specific goals) - this could look like naming feelings and body sensations that are emerging so children learn how to identify and verbalize their feelings, modeling regulation strategies like taking deep breaths or using movement so intense feelings start to feel more tolerable, modeling how to respond to challenges with self-compassion and a growth mindset, etc. As children repeatedly observe that there is a new way to respond to feelings and challenges (and start to get more practice facing challenges so their window of tolerance, or capacity for what they can face, is getting bigger), they eventually start to try out these new choices themselves and start to create new patterns. A lot of the work in play therapy is spent in this phase. This phase can look and sound like:
- Children’s window of tolerance, or their capacity to face and sit with intense feelings and challenges, is getting bigger (this can also look like processing of trauma and feeling less triggered by trauma reminders over time)
- Children are starting to respond to challenges and dysregulation in new ways; this is when I’ll start to hear from caregivers that meltdowns are getting less frequent, less intense, and aren’t lasting as long, anxiety is decreasing, etc.
- Caregivers are responding to meltdowns and dysregulation in new ways and are finding that children are responding more positively (and they’re able to support their own regulation)
3. The empowerment phase.
When children have practiced these new choices enough times that they’ve created new patterns (and they’ve found that these new choices lead to better results), this is when long-lasting changes emerge. Children may reach empowerment on one challenge before they’re ready to dive into a new way (and the process goes back to the exploration phase), or they may stay here for some time, in which case, we know we’re ready for termination from services. In empowerment, children have reached their goals that were initially set at the start of services, and their emotional and chronological ages are matching. This phase can look and sound like:
- Communication has greatly improved (this will look different depending on the child’s age and developmental stage). Children are identifying and verbally expressing feelings and needs, and older children go to caregivers for help and are able to engage in in-depth conversations about feelings and challenges
- Functioning at home and at school has improved because children’s ability to self-regulate and/or engage in co-regulation has improved. Anxiety, depression, and trauma symptoms have decreased. Caregivers feel more confident in supporting their children in co-regulating
- Children have more capacity to focus on their interests, strengths, and relationships. They are more resilient in the phase of challenges
Curious if play therapy would be the right fit for your kid? Wanting to get to the point where you understand the roots of your child’s feelings and behaviors and feel more confident in supporting them, leading to long-lasting change? Click the contact button to reach out now and schedule a free 15-minute introductory phone call. I’m so excited to connect and discuss how play therapy could benefit you and your child!