How to Create a Dopamine Menu: A Powerful Tool for Kids (& Adults!) with ADHD
What’s a Dopamine Menu — and Why Is It So Helpful?
One of my favorite tools to use in therapy sessions — especially with kids who have ADHD — is creating something called a dopamine menu.
Once kids (and their caregivers) learn that ADHD brains naturally produce less dopamine, so many of their behaviors begin to make more sense. Suddenly, what used to look like "bad behavior" or "distraction" starts to feel a lot more like behaviors to meet unmet needs. When our brain is already low on dopamine, it becomes even harder to make decisions—we’ll likely reach for quick fixes that provide fast dopamine hits such as eating sugar, scrolling on our phones, starting a fight (because it feels rewarding to win), or playing the same video game over and over.
This is where dopamine menus come in—when we recognize that we’re reaching for a quick dopamine fix (or notice that our children are doing the same), we can reference our menus and pick an activity that fits our current needs and time constraints and provides our brains with what we need. Over time, this is how we teach children (or ourselves) how to self-regulate—by recognizing what is going on with our brain and body internally, considering what we might need in that moment, and then engaging in something that helps us.
A Quick Refresher: What Is Dopamine?
Dopamine is a neurotransmitter — a brain chemical that plays a major role in how we feel, as well as our behavior, movement, and memory. It also controls our pleasure and reward systems.
When we anticipate something rewarding (like finishing a task or eating something tasty), dopamine gets released — and it helps us take action. But when dopamine levels are low (as they often are in ADHD brains), it's much harder to stay motivated, regulate emotions, or make thoughtful decisions.
What Low Dopamine Looks Like in Real Life
Here are some signs you could have low dopamine (which is common for those with ADHD):
Lack of motivation: Tasks that used to feel doable now feel overwhelming.
Low energy and sleep issues: Feeling physically or emotionally drained and difficulty falling or staying asleep.
Poor focus: Trouble concentrating, staying on task, or following through.
Low mood or apathy: Feeling flat, emotionally disconnected, or no longer finding pleasure in the things you used to.
Increased procrastination: Even basic tasks start to feel hard to complete.
Difficulty feeling accomplished: Feeling unfulfilled even when you do complete tasks or reach a goal.
Craving stimulants: Reaching for quick dopamine hits like sugar, caffeine, scrolling, or arguing.
And here are signs of low dopamine that can show up specifically in kids:
Boredom intolerance: Meltdowns or agitation when not stimulated.
Impulsivity: Seeking immediate gratification without thinking about long-term consequences.
Constant movement: Fidgeting, restlessness, and sensory-seeking behaviors.
Big emotional reactions: Challenges with emotional regulation and frustration tolerance.
Poor follow-through: Starting tasks with energy but losing interest and motivation quickly.
These behaviors aren’t random. They’re often the brain’s attempt to find dopamine fast through whatever’s accessible or are a response to experiencing low dopamine.
Creating a Dopamine Menu
A dopamine menu offers a proactive way to meet the brain’s dopamine needs with more intentional choices. It’s a list of activities — big and small — that give the brain a boost, organized in a way that’s easy to use when energy is low or emotions are high.
Instead of defaulting to quick fixes (like conflict or sugar), we can ask:
What does my brain need right now? How much time do I have? What kind of activity could help?
We can divide a dopamine menu into appetizers or starters (short, quick activities that give you an instant boost), main courses (longer activities that are more time-consuming but give you a bigger dose of dopamine), sides (things you can do alongside less desirable tasks), desserts (activities that make you feel good in the short-term but are best to not overdo and can often be used as rewards), and specials (activities that are really rewarding but are less frequent due to time and money constraints).
Let’s dive into what examples can look like for both kids and adults →
Starters or Appetizers
One minute of movement (such as jumping jacks, bouncing on a yoga ball, wall push-ups, etc.)
Cuddle a pet
Listen to an upbeat song (and have a dance party if you’d like)
Pick a task to complete and try a “beat the clock” challenge (or race someone)
Watch a short, funny video or scroll through short-form videos with a timer
Eat sour candy or use sour spray
Drink a fun drink through a straw (like an iced coffee, sparkling water, kombucha, etc.)
Put an aromatherapy blend on your pulse points
Light a candle or spray room spray
Main Courses
Try a new workout (sign up for a class or find a free one on YouTube!)
Play a sport
Engage in your favorite hobby, such as drawing, building Legos, knitting, etc.
Learn a new skill you’ve been wanting to try
Play a fast-paced card game, such as Uno
Complete a puzzle
Play a logic-based game, such as sudoku or a crossword puzzle
Complete a “power hour” - give yourself a list of tasks to complete in an hour, set a timer, and see how much you can get through and how quickly (this can be turned into a competition for the family and working toward a prize)
Redecorate or reorganize a small space
Play a favorite video game
Sides
Listen to a playlist of your favorite songs
Play LoFi beats, instrumental music, or your favorite white noise in the background
Chew gum or eat sour candy
Call or FaceTime a friend or family member while completing another task
Body doubling - work or complete chores alongside a friend or family member doing the same
Use a fidget or sensory tool
Draw or doodle
Wear compression socks or a weighted blanket
Use a timer and take movement breaks in between tasks
Give yourself points or stickers, working up to a larger reward
Desserts
Eat a sweet treat (if you have time, making it a special outing!)
Scroll through social media or short-form videos
Play a favorite game on your phone
Watch multiple episodes of a show
Watch a comfort show or movie
Text
Online shop or buy a new toy/game
A vent session with a friend or family member
Engage in a debate (pick the topic wisely and make sure both parties are on board)
Specials
Book a massage, facial, or spa day
Shop at a bookstore or plant shop
Buy a new toy, game, or tech item
Attend a concert
Visit an amusement park or waterpark
Plan and host a big friend hang, such as a potluck, BBQ, karaoke night, etc.
Attend a sporting event
Go bowling or visit an arcade
Go to a favorite museum
Go to an indoor climbing gym or ropes course
Have a “yes” day - if you’re a parent, let your kid be in charge for the day (within reason); if you’re an adult, plan a “yes” day for yourself
Want More Support? Let’s Talk
Want neurodivergent-affirming support for your child and practical ways you can show up for them? I’d love to support you and your family. Click the button below to schedule a free 15-minute intro call today.
Together, we can build tools that honor your child’s brain and make everyday challenges more manageable.